Santa Claus is Coming to Town!

Okay, the nativity scene in my living room is now officially larger than the Boston apartment that I occupied in graduate school.

Being one of those people (there are a lot of us really) who is not aligned with the notion that Jesus Christ was the divine Son of God, Christmas time is a little tricky. As I write this I can look out my office window to a hill that sprouts the very largest Jesus in the world. Down below in the city, people are running around like crazed weasels getting ready for his birthday party. Me included actually. My eldest daughter and I spent the morning making our annual photo album for my wife. Don't tell her. It's a surprise.

Now, I have written abut the challenge of this once before, in a Christmas Eve newsletter inspired by the first introduction of a nativity scene into our house in 1997. Then my proposed compromise was that we should paint our Baby Jesus with glow in the dark paint. I lost that but was delighted to discover when we moved to Cochabamba that here they actually sell glow in the dark statuettes of Baby Jesus. I got one!

Thankfully, those of us who love Christmas but shy away from the virgin birth have a savior of our own – Papa Noel, St. Nick, Chris Cringle, the most northern gringo of them all – Santa!! And this year I have decided to make my mark on our family's Christmas tradition (the rest of them are Catholics) with music, very specific music:

He's making a list.
He's checking it twice.
He's going to find out who's naughty and nice.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

He knows when you are sleeping.
He knows when you're awake.
He knows if you've been bad or good,
So be good for goodness sake.

My daughter Mariana who is 4 and in Christmas high gear is really into "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" and has been listening to the classic version most of us grew up on, sung by I-haven't-a-clue. She's memorized it. So the other day I decided it was time to broaden things a bit and I burned a CD of LOTS of different people singing "Santa Claus is Coming to Town." Now we can listen to it a dozen different ways, almost all of them better than the one that came with Frosty the Snowman.

Here, as a treat for our Blog readers, is my review of the best and oddest versions of Santa Claus is coming to town! And happily, you can hear a short snippet of any of these for free if you visit here (Don't download them, just click for the preview.).

The Worst: Regis Philbin

Do you need to ask?

Worth a Listen: The Jackson Five

Here is Michael Jackson in his full youthful splendor with his brothers before he became sort of whiter and weirder. It's got a beat.

Nostalgic: Captain Kangaroo

The captain that young US baby boomers grew up with teams up for a duet with Mister Green Jeans. If you don't know what any of that means definitely skip it.

Most Soul: The Supremes and the Pointer Sisters

I gotta call this a tie. The classic Supremes version slips in that very Motown new chorus, "Wooo, here comes Santa, comin', comin', here comes Santa, comin', comin'." Diana Ross and the girls backin' up have "you better not pout," down pat. Hard to beat. But when the Pointer Sisters belt this one out it seems clear that they are talking about a whole other kind of "bad." So, a tie.

Doesn't Really Work: Chris Isaac

What works for Neil Diamond covers does not work for Santa Claus. It's just a fact.

Didn't Even go There: The Carpenters

Maybe if Karen had lived and made a duet with Regis…

The One I Wish Existed: The Grateful Dead

Seriously, wouldn't you just want to listen to this one over and over and over? Maybe even as a combined effort with Dylan. Santa, this is what I really want this year!

Hands Down Best: Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band (Live)

Starts with Bruce heckling his band and asking if they have been rehearsing, asks Clarence of he wants a new sax, then asks the live audience to raise their hands if they've been good ("Not many. Not many"). Then he somehow turns Santa Claus into Thunder Road. Wipes Regis right out of your ears.

AND RUDOLPH

It's tempting to also go into the many fine covers of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (which Mariana calls the "Shiny Nose" song).

But, to be honest, there is no competition. There is really only one version of this song and that is the one by Tiny Tim. The ukulele cinches it.

Happy holidays to all readers of the Blog – whichever ones you celebrate!!